Confessions of a Professional Mom

Confessions of a Professional Mom

Professional mom seeking clarity, balance and a well deserved glass of wine.

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Waiting Room for Professional Moms

April 25, 2016 , , , , , , , , , , ,

Professional Moms Waiting RoomMany are waiting for their life to take off.
Who’s going to tell them that this could be their problem?
Tallyho, go, go – The Universe

What started in 1998 as an email sent out weekly to 38 addresses has since blossomed into today’s daily Notes from the Universe, sent to over 700,000 subscribers in 185 countries! Brief passages written by “The Universe,” personalized with your name (and occasionally your personal goals and dreams), are designed to remind you that you have, indeed, been given dominion over all things.

Fortunately, I signed up a couple of years ago and every morning since I receive a beautiful little reminder email that life is what you make it and that happiness and success aren’t coming…they’re already here. You can sign yourself up here.

Today’s note inspired this post. How many people do you know who are waiting for something to happen. Waiting for their life to take off or for that new job to present itself or for that muffin top to magically disappear or for your marriage to fix itself?! Maybe this is you? Over the last forty-eight years, I have been guilty of being stuck in the waiting room!

I catch myself slipping into fear mode and when I do, turning immediately to the old standby that is a neural pathway grooved deep into my brain — If this…then:

If this would happen, then….
my life would be better
I’d feel happier
I’d look better
I’d have more free time
my kids would be happier
I’d be a better mom
I’d be forgiven
I’d be successful
I’d be worthy

Personal Waiting Room
You’ve experienced the vibe of a waiting room —nerves on overdrive, pacing the floor, fidgety hands and one of two outcomes await you — the sheer dread that someone will walk through that door and deliver the bad news OR the anticipation of a precious new life or a surgery done right. I believe it’s ultimately the waiting that’s the hardest part. (thank you Tom Petty) That state of not knowing and feeling immobile until you hear the outcome. Waiting causes paralysis. You literally feel stuck, unable to move, frozen in time. And once you know, suddenly you have choices — to fall into a mire of sadness and depression or rise up and know that the rest of your life will be the best of your life, no matter what.

I’ve experienced both waiting room scenarios and, of course, I prefer the good news. Who wouldn’t?! From time to time I believe we put ourselves in, what I call, a personal waiting room where we wait for an outcome rather than create it. We think some source outside ourselves will bring the good news, the change, the successful outcome and that will decide the rest of our week or month or life.

One Think I Know
As Oprah would say, “One thing I know is this—no one person or thing or event is coming to decide your fate, so stop waiting and start deciding.” Stop counting on your husband to make a move for sex or ask you out on a date night—you initiate it and make each others day or plan the date and then make his night afterward. Stop waiting for that client to call you with a new account or project—pick up the phone and serve them; have a conversation that they’ll never forget. Stop waiting for the time to plan a GNO—put it on the calendar and just do it; guilt-free. Stop waiting for the time to exercise or eat right—just start putting good food in your mouth and walk around the block every night.

The point is this, happiness and success are already inside us. Right now, this very minute. You are good enough just the way you are. You are successful. You are a good mom. You are a super wife. And, hey, if the scenario is less than desirable, change it. If you want more romance, create it. If you want more money, create it. If you want more you time, create it. Want more adventure? Create it! (check out Time Warrior and Wealth Warrior, by Steve Chandler)

Energy Flows Where the Mind Goes
I hear this over and over again in meditations and yoga classes. It took me years to understand and fully believe it. This is powerful stuff! And, it’s true. When I’m constantly wishing I had more time and wishing I had more money or success or less laundry or less chetch on my thighs guess what happens? None of those things. Because I’m wishing instead of doing anything to create a difference. Here’s what I do instead and it actually works!

  1. Write down what you have; what you’re already grateful for.
  2. Write down how you’d like to feel (get the Danielle Laporte Planner).
  3. Write down what you need to do in order to feel that way–daily, weekly, monthly, yearly.
  4. Write down 3 Banner Goals for the next 30 days and 1 thing you’ll do each day toward each goal
  5. MOST IMPORTANT: check in with yourself weekly; forgive yourself if you fall short; keep moving forward

Step out of the waiting room. Life is happening.
Tally ho!

Stay sane, my friends.



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