Confessions of a Professional Mom

Confessions of a Professional Mom

Professional mom seeking clarity, balance and a well deserved glass of wine.

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Living the Dream

April 7, 2014 , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Living the Dream14 Going on 40 just returned from her 8th grade trip to our nations capital. Something I have suspected for a long time became very clear to me while she was away…she is one of my very best friends and my life would be so different without her in it. I learned, from my mother I suppose, that you are not friends with your kids–you are their parent first. Later on, after they’ve grown up, THEN, you can call yourself their friend.

I get the whole respect thing and tough parental love thing, when they don’t like the decisions we make. In all honesty, however, I have to say that my daughter is much more than my child. She is my friend. And, rather than waiting until I’m on my deathbed, I decided that NOW would be the perfect time to write her a letter and tell her what she means to me. It would go something like…”you are the daughter I always dreamed of having and our shared sense of humor and of design and the way you “get me” is a gift far beyond anything I could have imagined…”

Then my thoughts quickly turned to Professional Dad (aka: my husband for the last hundred years) and I thought, “I could write him the same letter!” …”you are the man I always dreamed of spending my life with, of having kids with, of laughing with until we can’t breathe, of traveling to far away places and hoping the taxi driver doesn’t take our money and leave us in the Mexican desert with…”

6 Going on 16 would get the same letter, crafted especially for her…“you are the daughter I always dreamed of having and the fact that every time I look into your eyes I see your dad and it makes me smile and feel so warm inside–and I marvel at how intuitive and smart you are and how your laugh sends us all into a fit of giggles and how you always know just when I need a hug and an I LOVE YOU MOM to keep me from running with scissors to the “dark place.”

Gosh! I feel the very same way about being a graphic designer and about my office and my friends and my sister and family…each is what I always dreamed of. Is this a state of mind or an actual fact? Subjective, to say the least.

Are you living the life you always dreamed of? If not, why not? What would be different?

Stay sane, my friends.

allison deford


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Beautifully profound! Your words warmed my heart, and brought tears to my eyes. Yes, I too am so eternally grateful for the wonderful companions I journey this life with. My son, my husband, my parents, my brothers, their families, my friends and so many others touch my life so deeply, and make me truly want to become the best version of me.

Thank you for what you have taught me, and for sharing something so valuable.




April 7, 2014

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