Confessions of a Professional Mom

Confessions of a Professional Mom

Professional mom seeking clarity, balance and a well deserved glass of wine.

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How Dare You!

January 22, 2013 , , , , , , ,

How Dare YouHow dare you take the day off to spend with your kids, since it’s ‘Martin Luther King Jr. Day’ or ‘Wear A Special Hat Day’ or whatever thing is significant enough to warrant a no school day.

How dare you don’t choose to take them snowboarding even thought it’s going to be 50 degrees and mushy in the local mountains.

How dare you cruise through the Starbucks drive thru and get them something to drink.

How dare you drive them down the coast and carry on a conversation by yourself as one sleeps and the other glares out the window in silence.

How dare you take your kids out to lunch at the BeachFire Grill in San Clemente and let them order whatever they want even though they won’t eat it all.

How dare you have only two cocktails to numb your frustration.

How dare you try walking around shopping; there are no little kids stores there.

How dare you stop off at Styles for Less so Thirteen Going on Thirty can look around and see what she likes while you wait in the car with Little Miss.

How dare you drive right past Old Navy where Little Miss wants (excuse me, needs) some new sweat pants.

How dare you drive them home while they sleep from the sheer exhaustion of complaining and whining all day because you didn’t do what they wanted to do.

How dare you not drive them directly to the children’s home or the nearest gypsy camp and make a deposit.

How dare you!

Stay sane, my friends.

allisondeford

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comments

Wait!!!! Were you in MY car this weekend? HOW DARE I start each weekend morning off with something fun for them because they worked SO DAMN HARD on their tests the week before!!!! I’m the worst mom EVER!!!!! I shouldn’t be allowed to even have kids!!!! They deserve so much better…huh?????? NOT!!! OH and this morning I got…I want to live in California so I can have dinner with Auntie Lori EVERY night….Tap her on the shoulder and tell her they are on their way….xoxoxox Until they snuggle in bed with me tomorrow morning…then they are stuck with me 🙂

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Wynona Grandi

January 22, 2013

Auntie Lori found that quite humorous! Do they know how mean she really is?! ha ha My prediction is that one day the petite ya ya’s will build a shrine to us and phone us (while we’re on extended vacations around the world) to say how bloody sorry they are for being such assholes. It’s my dream anyway.

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Allison DeFord

January 24, 2013

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